


A Silent Goodbye

by belladonna2648



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bad Wolf Rose Tyler, F/M, Post-Episode: s02e04 The Girl in the Fireplace, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-18
Updated: 2017-07-15
Packaged: 2018-11-15 09:48:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11228463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/belladonna2648/pseuds/belladonna2648
Summary: (After GITF) After the Doctor leaves Rose and Mickey for Madame de Pompadour, Rose is heartbroken and decides to leave the Doctor. What happens when he finds her again? Is he too late and has she fallen in love with someone else?





	1. Goodbye Doctor

**Author's Note:**

> Originally, this story was meant to end after one chapter...with a sad ending. I decided I just couldn't leave it like that.

Rose lay in her bed, face buried in her pillow…sobbing at the broken heart she now had. Hours earlier, Rose thought she had lost the Doctor. He had left her and Mickey on a ship in the middle of space with no way or returning and no idea of how they would return home. Her world was shattered. She had thought she had meant more to the Doctor, but when he so willingly crashed through a mirror to save some French courtesan…well, she was proven wrong.

She felt foolish. Foolish for thinking she meant something to him, foolish for allowing herself to show how much she cared, and foolish for hoping he would want to be with her after he finally came back. He didn’t want to be with her. In fact, the moment he had returned, he immediately went back to France for her. After seeing the Doctor’s heartbroken face when he realized she had died, Rose was grateful to Mickey when he pulled her out of the control room. She wasn’t sure if she could handle being his comfort device when he was pining away for another woman.

Now, Rose knew where she stood…knew what she was too him. Simply…a travel buddy. But no, not even that was right…because you don’t leave your buddies behind to die. And that’s just what he did…left them behind to die with no means of getting home. Mickey had stayed with Rose for a while in hopes of being some comfort to her, but when it hadn’t seemed to work, he knew she would rather be alone.

  
After having a good, long wallow in her room, Rose had one tiny piece of hope left in her. Maybe if she just went to the Doctor and told him how she felt, he would apologize and she might be able to see some resemblance of guilt on his face. If she could tell that he truly felt guilty for his actions, then maybe that meant he did care for her. Rose knew this was another foolish notion, but she had to try.

She set off down the hallway in search of the Doctor…looking in every room she possibly thought he might be in. When she still couldn’t find him, she decided to go back to the console room…having run out of ideas. Rose walked up to the console and stood in front of the monitor. “Hey, old girl. Can you show me where the Doctor is? Is he ok?” Rose asked the Tardis. At Rose’s request, an image of the Doctor popped up on the screen…and it looked like he was really, very not ok.

Sitting in front of a large fireplace, in what looked to be the library, sat the Doctor with his chin in his hands…tears streaming down his face. Rose didn’t know what he was really so sad about, but all that came to her mind was Madame de Pompadour. She had never seen the Doctor look so heartbroken before, let alone cry. Rarely had she even seen him show other emotions. And there he was…showing emotions…and crying over someone that wasn’t her.

In that moment, Rose finally understood how insignificant she was to him. How could she ever compete with a woman who was obviously so much more refined and cultured than she was? She decided…she just couldn’t stay anymore. Yes, there was one point when she had promised him forever, but that was a different time…a time when she trusted him with her life. That wasn’t the case anymore.

  
Rose walked back to her room, sobbing silently once again. Instead of plopping herself down on her bed again to wallow in her misery, she went straight for her closet and pulled out the large duffle bag she had brought with her. Standing in the middle of her large walk-in closet staring at her bag in hand, she stopped to ask the ship for a favor.

“Please, take me home. I can’t…I just can’t face him again. If I do, then I know I won’t be able to... Please, fly me home…and don’t let him know. Please?” Rose begged the Tardis. The Tardis hummed back its disapproval. “Please?! I can’t say goodbye…not to him. I don’t want him to see me like this…” Rose begged again, sobbing still. Giving in to her request, the Tardis hummed it’s ok. “One last thing though…don’t let him come after me. At least not for a while…years maybe. I just can’t do this anymore…” she said to the ship and the ship reluctantly hummed back another ok.

Rose made her way around her room, throwing in anything and everything she wanted that reminded her of the happier times. As she sat down on her bed one last time to look around her room, she knew something was off. Sure, she didn’t want to face him when she left, but that didn’t mean she didn’t want to say goodbye. She got up and walked over to a large desk in the corner of her room and sat down, pulled out some paper and a pen and began to write two letters…one to the Doctor and one to Mickey.

She knew that she owed Mickey a proper goodbye, but she only knew he would try to convince her to change her mind. Sure, Mickey had always been jealous of her relationship with the Doctor and she knew he always hoped she would leave him, but Mickey also knew how much she cared about the Time Lord and he knew that leaving him would break her heart. Ultimately, Mickey would never truly want her to leave him…not when he knew she loved him. Trying to suck back her tears long enough to get through this, she began to write her letters.

  
As soon as she lay her pen down, the Tardis let her know that she had silently landed them back at the Powell Estate. Rose walked back to her bed, picked up her bag and swung it over her shoulder as she headed to her bedroom door. She opened the door and turned around in the doorway one last time to give her room a final look. She had thought that this ship was her home, but now…she didn’t have the heart to stay when she knew how little she meant to it’s pilot.

Rose shut her bedroom door behind her and headed off down the hallway to the console room…tears once again streaming down her face. Now standing in front of the Tardis doors, she placed a hand on the handle and said a silent goodbye to the ship she had thought she would be in forever. “Goodbye.” She whispered as she slowly pushed open the doors in front of her.

Trying to build up the courage to take a step, she actually had begun to hope that the Time Lord would come bounding up the ramp behind her and stop her from leaving, but that hadn’t happened. Once again, she sadly laughed at her own foolishness. Rose walked through the doors and pulled them closed behind her. Taking a few steps back, she turned around to get one more look at the blue police box that had changed her life. With a deep breath, she turned around and walked away from the Doctor and then box silently disappeared.

~~~~~~~~BWBWBWBWBW~~~~~~~~

As the Doctor placed the letter from Reinette back into his pocket, all he could think about was how much pain he had once again caused to those he loved. She had trusted him and loved him and now, she was just another person that he had to watch die. Even though he didn’t feel the same way about her, he still cared for her as a friend and now he was too late to say goodbye. She had died before he could get there and the guilt of the broken promise to show her the stars was eating him alive.

In his sadness, he forgot the one person that he cared about most…Rose. Not knowing what to do, the Doctor turned and headed towards the library…the one place he was always able to quiet his thoughts and think. This had always been the room that him and Rose would go to after an especially tough adventure and he half expected to find her in there when he reached the room. When he entered, the fireplace was roaring thanks to the Tardis and the room was empty. Rose was always a comfort to him, but in his state of mind, he was rather glad she wasn’t there. He needed to think about the day’s events and looking into her eyes, he wouldn’t be able to do it clearly…she always had that effect on him.

Sitting in a large chair in front of the fireplace, tears began streaming down his face as he held his head in his hands. When he made the decision to break through the glass to save Reinette, he hadn’t even thought about the consequences. He knew he would have no way back, but in the moment it didn’t matter to him. He had to be the hero and save the damsel in distress, no matter the consequences. At the time, it seemed like the only option…but he was selfish. In his selfishness, he had forgotten about Rose…what had he done?

It was only now that he was starting to worry about what she was thinking. Was she upset with him? Did she hate him? Surely, she had to know why he did it…he had to save Reinette’s life. The equivalent of a loud yell sounded in the Doctor’s head from the Tardis letting him know he was quiet mistaken. The Tardis had let him know that Rose was very much upset with him. She tried to let him know he needed to go talk to her, but in his stubbornness, he didn’t listen. The Doctor needed some time to think things through.

He still hadn’t really ever admitted to himself just how in love he was with Rose Tyler or how much she had meant to him. It was until he thought he had broken her trust in him, that he started to worry about the consequences of what he had done. After meeting Sarah Jane, he promised her he would never leave her behind like the others…that she meant more to him than that…and he done just what he promised he wouldn’t do. He’d left her behind. As the tears fell from his eyes, images of a sobbing and heartbroken Rose flashed in his mind. The idea that he had done that to her, shattered his hearts.

After what felt like hours of being bombarded with mental nudges from the Tardis, the Doctor finally removed his head from his hands and acknowledged the ships calls to get up. His ship was right. He needed to get up, suck it up, and go find Rose. The Doctor set off down the hallway towards Rose’s room, in hopes of her being awake so they could talk. He had so much he wanted to say to her, but mostly he wanted to beg her forgiveness before it was too late. He hadn’t seen her since he got back on the Tardis after he realized Reinette had died and he was worried that he had broken her trust in him.

He always promised he would be there for her, but when he realized that he hadn’t even thought about her when he did what he did, he couldn’t believe himself. She meant so much more to him than anyone ever had and he left her behind. As he reached her bedroom door, he stood for a moment trying to think of what he would say to her. He still hadn’t realized that the images he had seen in his head, were projections of what Rose was going through. What if she was furious with him? What if she yelled at him? Or worse…what if she really was heartbroken? It was true that an angry Rose was not something he liked to see, but a crying Rose was even worse.  

He slowly removed his hand from his pocket and knocked on her door. “Rose? Are you awake?” he quietly called through the door. “Rose? Can I come in? I want to talk to you…” he said when she didn’t respond. Rose not responding to him was not a good sign and he now thought that he was in even more trouble than he realized cause even if she was livid with him, she still acknowledged him. “Rose? Please talk to me. Rose?” When once again she didn’t answer, it had dawned on the Doctor that maybe she wasn’t in her room.

Standing in the hallway outside of Rose’s room, he asked the Tardis for her location. “So then, where is she?” he asked his ship. A hum from the Tardis told him to head to the console room. As he made his way down the hallway, hope began to build inside him. If Rose was in the console room, then maybe she was waiting for him…maybe she actually did want to talk to him and that was a good sign.

However, his hopes were dashed when he reached the console room and did not spot Rose anywhere. “I thought you said she would be here!” he yelled to his ship. Instead of a reply from his ship, an envelope addressed to him appeared on the console in front of him. He swallowed as he saw the handwriting that belonged to Rose. The Doctor’s hands began to shake as he opened the letter from Rose and as he read the words on the page, his hearts stopped and he suddenly felt as though his entire world was gone. Rose…was gone.    

 

_My dearest Doctor,_

_I hope the Tardis has been kind enough to make sure this letter finds you. If she has, then I am gone and I have asked the Tardis to take me home. I realized after you left us, just how stupid I was to ever think we were…nevermind. You broke my heart Doctor. And I realized…I can’t do this anymore. I can’t wait around hoping one day you’ll care about me like that…like I did about you. I don’t regret one moment of my time with you, but I don’t think my heart can take anymore. I’ve always been honest with you, Doctor, but you’re so closed off. You won’t talk to me about anything and you shut down instead of opening up, but I deserve some honesty…and you haven’t given me that. What you’re not saying, Doctor, is coming in loud and clear and I finally understand. I’m never going to mean as much to you as she did._

_Please, don’t come after me Doctor and…have a fantastic life._

_\- Rose_

The world around the Doctor shattered as it sank it. His actions had hurt Rose so deeply, that his worst fear was realized. She couldn’t stand to be with him anymore. He lost her…she left. It was only then that the Doctor finally admitted to himself…he loved her and now…he was too late. Knowing he needed to do everything he could to make it up to her and beg her to come back, he set the coordinates into the console for Powell Estate.

He tried to get the Tardis to take him back to the moment she had left. He hoped he would find her just as she had stepped out of the Tardis and beg her forgiveness, but the Tardis would not comply. After many minutes of the Tardis refusing to listen, the Doctor was finally able to land her. As he headed towards the Tardis doors, he thanked his ship and opened the doors to step outside. It was only then he realized that the Tardis had not infact listened to him after all.

He did not land on the Powell Estate and it most certainly was not the right date either. By the sense of things, the Tardis had landed the Doctor about 5 years into the future…in Cardiff. The Doctor didn’t want to be here. He knew that if he had landed too far into the future, it would mean that too much time had passed and Rose might have moved on. He wanted to bolt back into the Tardis and leave before he could see anything…or anyone…before he could change the outcome. However, before he could even turn back towards the doors…he heard the one sound that he feared he would…Rose’s laugh.

The Doctor spun around to the right and there she was…even more beautiful than she was before, but the sight before him made the regret and the want to not believe rise in him. There in the distance was Rose Tyler in the arms of…Captain Jack Harkness. As the Doctor watched Rose laugh into his shoulder as Jack picked her up and spin her around, the jealousy began to overwhelm him. That should be him with Rose, not Jack. Just as he was ready to walk up to Rose and pull the two apart, the next sight stopped him in his tracks. Jack leaned forward and kissed Rose. The Doctor felt his hearts drop out of his chest. He was too late. Rose had left him and moved on with her life…and was in love with someone else. The Doctor had lost Rose Tyler.


	2. Too Late

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose moves on with her life. The Doctor discovers what has happened to Rose since she's been gone.

Rose was heartbroken after she left the Doctor and although it was her choice, she still missed him terribly. Still, she had always been an incredibly strong person and she knew she had to get on with her life. Not only for herself, but also to show her family and friends that she could…that she could live a life without him. But most of all, she wanted to show him that she didn’t need him. 

So it wasn’t surprising that it didn’t take her long to get back on her feet again…only a mere couple of weeks. She couldn’t go back to the life she had before the Doctor, so she decided that her time with him might be good for something and used the one connection she could think of. Two weeks after the Tardis had disappeared, two weeks after trying to figure out where her life would go now, that tiny little voice in the back of her mind told her what to do. “Find me, if you need to one day…find me.” Rose decided to find Sarah Jane Smith. 

After a long visit with the only person Rose could think of that might understand what she was going through, Sarah Jane had put Rose in contact with an old friend of hers in UNIT. It didn’t take much convincing during her first meeting with the Brigadier before he had offered Rose a job. Sure Sarah Jane had put in a good word, but all Rose had to do was tell him she was a companion of the Doctor’s and she was set. Rose began working for UNIT a week later. 

However, it was during a mission a year later that Rose had discovered she was being sought out. Rose had been standing in the middle of an abandoned warehouse with a gun pointed at her head by a rather nasty Sontaran. She had closed her eyes and had prepared herself for the shot, when she heard a thud. When Rose opened her eyes, the Sontaran was out cold on the floor and standing in front of her with a mallet in his hands was Captain Jack Harkness. 

“Rose!” he yelled at her as he jumped over the alien and wrapped her in a tight hug, swinging her in the air. 

“Jack! What are you doing here?!” she said as he slowly set her down on the ground. 

“Looking for you of course!” he said to her with a smirk. 

“Wait, how are you even here? The Doctor said you stayed behind…” Rose started. 

“Oh, it’s a long story sweetheart…one that I intend to fill you in on, but first…how about a drink?!” Jack said to Rose as he stuck out his elbow for her to take. 

It had taken a good couple of hours and a few pints before Rose and Jack were fully caught up on what had happened since they last saw each other. As it turned out, it was only a few days ago that Jack had heard that Rose Tyler was working for UNIT and set out to find her. 

“You could have just called me, Jack…” she teased him. 

“Oh, you know how I like to make an entrance…besides, I got to play the hero!” he said with a smile. 

It was only then that Jack had informed her that he was immortal and was in fact looking for the Doctor. He was quite surprised when she said she had left him. Before they had parted company, Jack had convinced Rose to leave her job at UNIT and come to work with him at Torchwood. 

“Why not Rose? After all, it was you and the Doctor that inspired its creation anyway!” he said. 

“Oh, all right then Jack.” Rose finally agreed. 

It didn’t take long for the other members of Jack’s team to warm up to Rose…it didn’t take long for anyone to warm up to Rose. Over the next year, tiny sparks had been lit here and there between Jack and Rose. Initially, Rose had shot down all of Jack’s advances…just telling herself that it was just Jack being Jack. He’ll hit on anything with a pulse. It took Rose a long time to realize that his interest in her was genuine and Rose didn’t know what to do. 

She had always just thought of him as a good friend, despite their initial attraction during their first meeting. After he began traveling with her and the Doctor, she had never really seen him as a romantic interest. However, after working with him and practically living with him every day, things slowly began to change between them. Jack’s comments became less sarcastic and more romantic, his touches became slower and softer, and Rose began to notice a look in his eyes when he would look at her…it was a look she thought she used to see when the Doctor looked at her. 

As soon as Rose put the pieces together, her heart fluttered. The next thing she knew, she was nervous around him…shy even. It didn’t take long for Jack to notice the change in Rose either…as soon as he realized she was falling for him, he made his move. It had been a rather long day fighting the usual aliens around town. The rest of the team had headed for home, but Jack and Rose stayed behind to go over some paperwork. 

When they were finished, Jack had stood up to give Rose a hug before she left his office and let it linger a bit longer than normal. He pulled back from Rose, his arms still wrapped around her, and ran his fingers through her hair. “Jack?” she said to him, noticing that look in his eyes again. He simply smiled at her, leaned in and pressed his mouth to hers. Her heart fluttered and her knees went weak. They had been a couple ever since. 

On this day, five years after she had left the Doctor, Rose was living a pretty fantastic life. Rose had moved out of her mum’s flat and her and Jack had built an apartment of sorts for themselves underneath Torchwood…because nothing else made sense to them. Anything else was too normal. Rose got out of bed in the morning expecting to feel the usual aches and pains of the previous day’s events, but was surprised when she felt perfectly normal. 

Maybe she was just getting used to it, she thought. Maybe she was just building up her strength…it had to happen sometime, right? With Jack still asleep in bed, Rose went to the bathroom to brush her teeth and hop in the shower. As Rose was standing in front of the mirror, toothbrush in hand, she gasped at what she saw. 

With her wet hair wrapped in a towel on top of her head and a make-free face, they were glaring back at her. Her eyes were gold. Rose got closer to the mirror and used her index finger on each hand to poke at her eyes and tug at her lids. How was that possible? A person’s eyes don’t just change color like that! 

“Jack!” she yelled from the bathroom. As he entered the bathroom, Jack’s face lit up. 

“Good morning to you too, doll!” he said as he took in the towel that she was wearing, clearly just out of the shower. 

“Jack!” Rose yelled to him again, panic in her voice. 

Finally bringing his eyes to her face, Jack saw the horrified look on her face. “What is it Rose? What’s wrong?!” he asked her as he stepped forward and rubbed her arm. 

“Look!” she said as she pointed to her eyes. 

“Why are your eyes gold Rose?” he asked her hesitantly. 

“I don’t know! Jack, what’s happened?” she asked, panicked. 

“I don’t know Rose, but we need to find out. Will you let Owen run some tests on you?” he asked her. Rose nodded her head. 

“It’s ok…we’ll find out what’s going on.” Jack said, trying to comfort her. 

After multiple tests and many hours later, Rose had decided she needed some fresh air and decided to for a walk. Rose couldn’t go far, her mind too muddled with possibilities to let her feet move, and she began pacing back and forth in front of the Torchwood entrance. Meanwhile, Jack was downstairs hounding Owen to tell him what he had found. Seeing how reluctant Owen was being, Jack knew it had to be something big. 

“Owen! Tell me right now!” he yelled. 

“Uh, ok…Jack, well you know I took samples of her blood, DNA, cells…the whole lot. I ran multiple tests and well…” he began nervously. 

“Well, what?!” Jack yelled. 

“Well, she seems to be like you…well, not exactly like you, but like you.” Owen said. 

“What do you mean ‘like me’?” Jack asked. 

“Well…she can’t die.” Owen stated. 

Jack stumbled backwards at Owen’s words. “What…what do you mean she can’t die?” he asked. 

“Well, her cells…it’s like they’re indestructible. Also, her blood…there’s something different about it. I can’t quite explain it…her blood is different than yours, but we had the same effect. We ran the same tests on hers that we ran on yours and well…we got the same results. She’s not quite like you, but she can’t die. I don’t know how this happened though. It’s like she’s not quite human anymore.” said Owen. 

Jack stood there in shock. Rose couldn’t die…how? Not human anymore? How was that possible? He didn’t know what to think, what to do. He was starting to panic. They needed to find out what happened to her and how, but where would they start. He couldn’t even figure out what had happened to himself, so how was he going to figure out what happened to her? There was only one person he could think of that could help and he knew it was the last person Rose would want to see. 

Jack needed to find the Doctor, but what would Rose say? She would tell him that there had to be a way to do this without him. Jack knew one thing though…he wouldn’t figure anything out by keeping things from her. That is what the Doctor did and look where it got him. Jack stood there, pacing back and forth…trying to think when Gwen brought him out of his thoughts. 

“Jack? I know you think this is bad, but whatever Owen has found…look at it this way…she’s not being taken away from you Jack. She’s being given to you. She can’t die…just like you. She’s gonna be with you for a long time. That’s good isn’t it?” Gwen asked him. 

“You don’t understand…I can’t subject her that…living forever…” and with that, Jack stopped himself. 

He was starting to sound like the Doctor. He needed to talk to Rose. She needed to know what was happening to her and only when he saw her reaction, would he be able to figure out their next step. Jack ran out to the lift and took it up to the surface, prepared to run as far as he had to in order to find Rose. He didn’t have to go too far when he saw her pacing in front of him. 

“Rose…” he said as she slowly turned around to see him stepping off of the platform. 

“Owen find anything yet?” she asked him, her arms wrapped nervously around her. 

“Ya, he did. We don’t know how, but…Rose…it looks like something has changed your physiology.” he began slowly. 

“What does that mean?” she asked, starting to panic. He rubbed one hand down each arm in an attempt to calm her. 

“It means…it means you won’t be able to die. You’ll live for a very long time…like me.” Jack said as Rose froze, her eyes fixed on his. 

“W-What? What do you mean I won’t die?” she asked him. 

“We don’t know how it happened, but something in your past has started changing your body so you won’t die. Kinda of like me or the Doctor. I can never die, whereas he can regenerate and live for a very long time, but ultimately he can die. I don’t know if this means you’ll live for a very long time or if you’re immortal…” he tried to explain. 

“So am I gonna regenerate? Does that mean I’m a Time Lord or something?” she asked. 

“Time Lady, but I don’t know. You only have one heart…so I don’t think so. But you’re eyes Rose…they’ve turned gold. I don’t know what that means, but it’s not like me or the Doctor.” Jack said as Rose tried to process what she was hearing. 

“Rose, we need to find out what’s happened to both of us…and I have a feeling the only person that can help is the Doctor.” he reluctantly said to her. 

“No! No, there’s got to be someone else. I don’t want to see him Jack, I can’t…we don’t need him.” she begged him and he relented. 

“Ok, we’ll find someone else.” he said and she smiled. “Thanks, Jack.” she said to him. 

As Rose and Jack stood there outside of Torchwood, both reeling from news they had just heard…something dawned on Jack. 

“Rose? How do you feel about this? I mean…living forever? I mean, I remember how I felt when I first realized it…how do you feel?” he asked her. 

After a pause, she answered. “I don’t know…I mean, the Doctor always made it sound so horrible. Outliving everyone around him…watching everyone he loved die…being alone. But then you…I’m not saying all of that doesn’t bother you as well, but you just seem so much more positive about it. I guess…I don’t know.” she responded. 

“Well…Gwen seems to think it’s a good thing. She thinks that now you and I will be together forever.” he quietly said to her. 

With that thought, Rose’s face slowly lit up with a smile. “I hadn’t thought of that, but maybe she’s right….maybe this is a good thing. Looks like you’re stuck with me then!” she said, smiling at him. 

“You mean it? You’re really happy about this?” he asked her, bending down to look into her eyes. 

“Ya, guess I am…you got me forever!” she said to him. In a moment of sheer excitement, Jack picked up Rose in his arms and spun her around…her face buried into his shoulder and arms wrapped around his neck…laughter erupting from her lips. 

“You have no idea how happy this makes me. I love you!” he said to her as his hand moved to cup her cheek. 

“I love you too, Jack!” she replied. Jack leaned forward and kissed Rose. Just as Jack was pulling back from the kiss, his eyes stopped at someone standing behind them in the distance. 

In the distance, Jack saw a tall, thin man in a pinstriped suit and long coat…watching them. The man’s eyes fixed on the pair of them, hurt and anger seeping from his eyes. Behind the man, was the Tardis. Although he hadn’t seen this recent incarnation of the Doctor, Jack knew it was him. Jack knew that he had come back for Rose…and he wasn’t happy with what he was seeing. 

“Jack? What is it? What’s wrong?” Rose asked him as she noticed him tense up, a guarded look over his face. Jack didn’t say anything, but instead nodded behind her. Rose turned around to see what he was looking at and her heart stopped when she saw the Doctor watching her in the distance. She held his gaze for a moment, before breaking eye contact and turning back towards Jack. 

Rose was suddenly flooded with emotions she thought she had gotten over. She thought she had gotten over the hurt the Doctor had caused her, but now that he was standing there looking at her…she realized her broken heart wasn’t quite healed after all. She loved Jack tremendously, but broken promises were still eating at her. 

“I guess the Tardis listened after all. I told her to wait at least a couple of years before letting him come after me.” she said. 

“By the look on his face, I’d say he just lost you. I don’t think the Doctor is the kind of man who likes to wait.” Jack said to her. 

“Guess I was hoping he wouldn’t come after me at all…figured he wouldn’t care once I was gone.” she said to Jack. 

Standing there, staring the Doctor in the eyes with his arms wrapped around the woman he knew the Doctor loved, Jack expected the Doctor to charge forward and rip her from his arms. Although Rose was dead set on thinking the Doctor never cared about her, Jack knew otherwise. To his surprise though, the Doctor took a deep breath and hung his head…as if in defeat. 

Jack was shocked…the Doctor never accepted defeat. He watched as the Doctor looked back up at Jack, then move his eyes to Rose…looking as if tears would fall any moment. The Doctor turned away from them and headed back towards his Tardis. 

“He’s leaving.” Jack said to Rose, almost confused. 

Rose whipped hear head around to see the Doctor walking away from her once again. She had always thought that the Doctor didn’t care enough about her to miss her once she left, but standing there looking at him…knowing he came after her…she had expected him to run up to her and beg her to come back with him. She didn’t expect to see him walking away without a fight…as if to say “I’m done.” Watching as the Doctor approached his Tardis, Rose once again felt abandoned by the Doctor. 

~~~~~~~~BWBWBWBW~~~~~~~~  
As he stood there and watched Jack and Rose together, the Doctor realized that this must be what a broken heart felt like…or broken hearts, because this hurt twice as much as he thought it would. It seemed that the Doctor hadn’t realized just how much he had loved Rose Tyler until he had lost her. When she turned around and looked at him, his chest tightened. There she was, staring into his eyes, and all he could see in hers was hurt when she saw him…until she looked away from him. 

This was all his fault and he had just realized the amount of damage he had done…and he could think of nothing to do to make it better. Rose deserved better than him…she deserved to be happy and she obviously was happy with Jack. The Doctor felt defeated, he took in a deep breath to stop tears that were threatening to fall and looked down, away from the happy couple in front of him. 

The Doctor had messed up big time and missed his chance. He had lost Rose and now it was time for him to leave her to live her life and for him to live his…alone. The Doctor turned and walked back towards his ship, stopping one last time in the doorway to look at Rose and say a silent goodbye to her. As he turned around, his heart stopped when he saw Rose was watching him…her face looked heartbroken…and all he could think of was that he had done that to her. 

However, with his eyes locked onto Rose’s, his hearts began to beat in double-time when he saw her eyes glowing gold as she watched him. The Doctor froze…a look of panic struck across his face. He had not seen Rose’s eyes glowing that color since the Game Station…when she took in the Time Vortex. But that was impossible…he had taken it out of her. So how could it be in her now?

In the distance, it seemed as though Jack had noticed the look on the Doctor’s face as he saw Jack grab Rose’s head and turn it back towards her. He watched as Jack looked into Rose’s eyes and an expression came over his face that was more startled than scared. Apparently, this didn’t surprise Jack and a jealously bubbled up in his stomach. It seemed as though they had already known. 

That was the Doctor’s cue…they didn’t need him and if they wanted his help, they would have asked. As the Doctor prepared to turn back around and close the Tardis doors, he was stopped by someone standing in his ship in front of him. 

“Oi! What the hell is this?!” yelled Mickey, looking as though he had just woken up from a long sleep and waving an opened letter in his face. The Tardis had placed Rose’s letter to Mickey on his nightstand for him to find when he woke up and it seemed he was none too happy about it. 

“Rose is gone.” replied the Doctor, rather somberly. 

“Ya, I got that…how could she just leave like that. I mean, I don’t care if she leaves you, but she didn’t even tell me…after all we’ve been through!” Mickey yelled at him. 

“I’m sorry, Mickey.” the Doctor said. 

“Bloody hell you are! This is all your fault! If you hadn’t broken her heart and run off to leave us to die for some French bimbo, she’d still be here!” Mickey yelled and this time, the Doctor didn’t have a response. Mickey was right. 

“Wait a minute?! If she’s gone, then why do I see her standing right there…with Captain Cheesecake? What’s going on?” he yelled again at the Doctor as he pointed to the Rose he saw standing outside. The Doctor tried to stop Mickey from going after the future Rose by putting an arm in front of him, but to no avail. 

“Mickey, you can’t go out there. That Rose is from five years in the future…she’s not your Rose!” the Doctor warned him. 

“I don’t bloody care what year it is! I want some answers!” he said as he pushed the Doctor’s arm out of the way and stormed out of the Tardis towards Rose and Jack. 

As the Doctor watched Mickey storm off towards Rose, he turned back into his Tardis and headed for the console…leaving the doors open for Mickey when he returned. If Mickey wanted to get his answers, that was fine with him…but he wouldn’t be a part of it and clearly Rose and Jack didn’t want him to be. The Doctor approached the console and began doing a scan of Rose. Since she was in such close proximity to the Tardis, it wasn’t hard for his ship to pull it off, but the Doctor wasn’t ready for what he had found. 

The monitor informed him that Rose was indeed part of the Time Vortex again and somehow her body was sustaining it. Unfortunately, he couldn’t get many more answers without Rose being in the ship and he was confident that was something that would never happen again. Just then, the Doctor was pulled out of his thoughts by a yell from outside. 

“Doctor!” he heard Mickey yell. “Get out here!” 

The Doctor ran to the doors and leaned his head out, searching for Mickey. 

“Doctor!” he heard him yell again before he found the three of them standing in the same spot in the distance. 

“Get over here!” Mickey yelled at him again. 

Reluctantly, the Doctor set foot out his ship and began walking towards Rose, Mickey, and Jack. He could see from where he was that Rose was trying to convince Mickey everything was ok. A lump formed in the Doctor’s throat. Clearly, Rose didn’t want to talk to him. As he got closer, Mickey pointed at Rose and yelled at him. 

“Will you look at her eyes?! What the bloody hell is wrong with her!?” he yelled. 

Quickly, the Doctor’s eyes flittered to Rose and it only took a second for him to take in the whole scene. Rose was standing opposite of the Doctor, her hand entwined with Jack’s while he stood in front of her protectively…Mickey on the other side of her, gaping at her eyes. When he noticed that Rose was avoiding his eyes, he looked away towards Mickey. 

“It’s ok Doctor, you might as well tell us. I know you were in there trying to figure it out.” The Doctor heard Jack say to him. The Doctor let out a large sigh before responding. 

“The Time Vortex.” he said. 

“What does that mean?” Jack asked him. Looking down at his feet, the Doctor responded. 

“It seems like Rose still has some of the Time Vortex in her…that’s where the gold eyes come from. I guess I didn’t get it all out of her after all.” he said. 

“Ya, no shit. Is that why she can’t die?” Jack asked him. 

“What?! What do you mean she can’t die?!” yelled Mickey as the Doctor’s head snapped up towards them in astonishment as well. He looked from Jack to Rose, who still wasn’t looking at him, and then back to Jack. 

“What do you mean she can’t die Jack?” he asked him. 

“Just found out…my team ran some tests and found out that her whole physiology is changing…she can’t die. We don’t know if she can regenerate, we just know her body isn’t able to die.” said Jack. 

The Doctor suddenly felt a panic spreading over him. This shouldn’t be possible…keeping the vortex in her head would have killed Rose, not changed her. How was this possible? Suddenly, he froze as a new thought popped in his head. Rose would now live for a very long time…maybe even longer than he would…and she wouldn’t be spending it with him. She would be spending her forever with Jack now…and the final pieces of his heart shattered. 

He looked over to Rose, who looked like she was cutting off the circulation to Jack’s hand. 

“Rose?” the Doctor quietly said to her. He was surprised when she actually turned to look at him and he didn’t know whether to be happy or sad that she made eye contact. 

“Rose, do you feel ok?” he asked her. 

“I’m always ok.” she said to him somberly, sadness still evident in her eyes and the Doctor gulped. 

“This should be impossible. You shouldn’t be able to sustain having all of that power in you, but it seems that instead of killing you, it has changed you.” the Doctor said to her. 

“Will I ever be able to die?” she asked him. 

“Well, you are linked to the Time Vortex through the Tardis. As long as the Tardis lives, you will live…which will be a very, very long time…no matter where you are.” he explained to her. 

She nodded. The Doctor wanted to run to her, wrap his arms around her and never let go…but she wasn’t his anymore. He was no comfort to her, so he looked away. 

“What about me, Doc?” he suddenly heard Jack ask. 

“What happened to me?” Jack asked. 

The Doctor looked over to Rose, who was now watching him curiously. He had never told her what had happened to Jack and now in their current situation, he was scared to. He had already broken her heart and now she might hate him even more, but he reluctantly explained. 

“Rose…” the Doctor began as hers, Jacks, and Mickeys eyes all went wide. 

“What?” she asked nervously. 

“When Rose took in the Time Vortex, not only did she kill all of the Daleks…but she also brought you back to life, Jack.” he said as she watched Jack turn and look at Rose. 

Her face was stunned and tears began falling from her eyes. It was evident that she couldn’t believe what she had done. 

“Only, she didn’t know how to control it…she brought you back forever.” the Doctor said. 

As both Jack and Rose stood there stunned into silence, the Doctor had wished he had never said it…but they both deserved to know at last. Rose turned towards Jack and buried her head in his chest. 

“I’m so sorry, Jack!” she sobbed. 

“Hey, it’s ok Rose.” he said to her as he lifted her chin with his finger so he could look in her eyes. 

“It all worked out, didn’t it? I mean, who else would you have to spend eternity with, huh?” Jack said to her. 

As his words, the Doctor felt a stab in his chest. At one point, Rose wanted to spend forever with him. It seemed now, even Jack believed that the Doctor had abandoned her if he assumed he wouldn’t want her forever.


	3. Running

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose has some thinking to do.

As Rose stood there facing the man that she had given eternal life, guilt kept boiling to the surface bit by bit. It seemed the more Jack tried to comfort her, the more guilt she felt. Deep down, she just hoped that he would yell at her for ruining his life…after all, that is what she thought she deserved. She had damned him to not just living for a very long time like the Doctor. No, in her mind, what she had done was far worse. She had given Jack eternal life…a never-ending life, watching everyone around him die and not being able to die himself. When the universe ended, when all of the planets were burnt and gone…Jack would still be floating in the dark abyss…alone and alive. 

“Rose…it’s really ok!” Jack said to her as she closed her eyes and turned her head away from him…eyes brimming with tears. 

“But it’s not ok Jack! Don’t you see that! It’s all my fault!” Rose began to sob quietly. 

“It’s not going to be so bad…I have you to spend eternity with now.” Jack said, hoping to bring a small smile back to her face. 

But it did not. Infact, his words had made the guilt in her even worse. It was ok for her to damn herself to an eternal life, but she would never want to inflict that burden on the ones she loved. After many moments, Rose finally opened her eyes…her head still turned away from Jack. Instead, the first set of eyes she sees is the Doctor’s…still starring at hers. There is a look in his eyes of pure understanding mixed with heartbreak and sorrow. Now, in her misery, she finally understood the emotion behind the madness. 

She had never seen the Doctor look so incredibly heartbroken before…not even on the monitor when she thought he was crying over Reinette. And what confused her even more was the thought that he wouldn’t look that sad over her if he didn’t really care for her. Now, having to deliver the news to them of what she had done, she also saw immense guilt in his eyes. She knew that look on his face…it was his silent “I’m so sorry” face. 

Then, it suddenly dawned on her. No one else would ever know how this burden felt…no one else that is, except him. Sure, Jack would have to watch those around him wither and die and in that respect, he was very much like the Doctor. However, Jack also didn’t have the ability to inflict that burden onto others…not like she and the Doctor did. In that instance, a small piece of the wall she had built up to protect her heart from the Doctor, had chipped away. 

Jack would never understand, but he would…and her heart broke again. Why couldn’t they have all figured this out sooner. As she turned her gaze back to the man who had his arms wrapped around her, a need began to rise in her stomach. A need to run…and run as fast as she could. Feeling the weight on her of the three men standing around her that had all at one time, or quiet possibly still loved her, she felt the agitation building in her legs. 

“I’m sorry…I can’t do this…” she said as she extracted herself from his arms and took off running anywhere her legs would take her. 

Rose had no idea how long she had been running for before she stopped, but her legs had led her back to a wharf that they had found themselves at the last time all four of them had been in Cardiff. Of course that was back when the Doctor was all big ears and leather…and the memories flashed through her head. As Rose sat herself of the edge of the pier, her legs dangling over the side, so many thoughts began swirling in her mind. The amount of information she had just received was overwhelming and at the same time, life changing. Rose was close to immortal and not only that, but she has damned the man she loves to eternal life. The guilt began to overpower her. 

Could she spend the rest of eternity starring at the person whose life she had damned? With that thought, Rose stops herself when the Doctor pops into her head. Rose had thought she had moved on. She thought she was over the Doctor, but all it took was seeing him again and seeing the look in his eyes to make her realize that wasn’t true. And that added to the guilt that was now piling up on her. She loved Jack tremendously and they had a happy life together…now, that life would be forever. But once again the question popped up in her mind. 

Could she look him in the eyes for the rest of forever knowing that she is the one who inflicted that upon him? Sure, she knew that the Doctor would blame himself for her immortality now, but the difference was that she chose to take in the Time Vortex. The Doctor didn’t force it upon her like she did to Jack. Rose leaned her head over her legs and starred at her reflection in the water. As she looked into her now golden eyes, she wondered what she was going to do now. Who was she now? What did this all mean?

This was more responsibility and power than Rose had ever wanted. She had always thought she knew who she was and at one point, that meant that she would be at the side of the Doctor. Then the day came when he betrayed her and not knowing that her life had already changed forever, she left him. Now, she didn’t know. Not once since her and Jack had gotten together had she for one second questioned her love for him…or her life with him. But what was the truth now? 

The truth that hit her was that Rose still loved the Doctor, but just because he came back for her doesn’t mean he loved her the same way. She was trying to tell herself that he just felt guilty. That would help her to stay with Jack…who she knew without a doubt loved her. Rose kept fighting with the same internal monologue and she swung her legs back and forth from the pier, wishing she had someone there now to get some advice from. 

Of course, there was no one else in the universe that would really be able to understand what she was going through. The only two people that might understand, were also part of the problem. She closed her eyes and sighed to herself. She had no idea how much time had passed since she had been sitting there, but she didn’t care…time would not be an issue anymore. However, what startled her out of her thoughts was the sound of footsteps approaching behind her. As she opened her eyes, she saw the reflection of the Doctor standing behind her. 

“Hello.” she said sadly. 

“Hello.” he responded somberly. The Doctor slowly sat down on the pier next to her without saying another word. 

“How did you find me?” she asked him. 

“I know you, Rose Tyler.” he said simply. She turned and looked at him, seeing the same look of sadness in his eyes. 

“Jack and Mickey thought you might need some time alone, but I wanted to make sure you were ok. Are you alright?” he asked her. 

“I hardly know.” she responded. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked him after a beat. 

“Because I didn’t want you to have to shoulder the burden.” he said. 

“And I’m so sorry Rose…I really never thought that you and him would be…” but the Doctor couldn’t finish his sentence. 

“Rose, just know…you’re not alone in this. I know you’re upset with me, but Jack isn’t the only one who you have to go through this with.” he said to her. Rose had to admit to herself, that those words were comforting to hear. 

“If anyone might understand what I’m going through, it’s you Doctor. I just don’t know what to do now. Never mind me. How can I go back and look at him, knowing that I’ve done this to him?” she said, before turning to finally look at him properly. 

He didn’t have a response for her, but he knew exactly how she was feeling. Upon locking her eyes with his, she was reminded of why he was here in the first place…she had left him and he came back for her. 

“Why did you come back for me, Doctor?” Rose asked him, not removing her eyes from him. 

The Doctor didn’t know how to respond. He thought to himself that it was obvious Rose had hated him and moved on with her life…she would have a very long and happy life with Jack now. So what was the point in telling her why? Why, when he had just barely admitted it to himself. He came after her because he loved her…the Doctor loved Rose Tyler…and he wanted her back. He looked away from her, then down towards the water. It dawned on him though that if he had indeed lost her, then this might be his last chance. 

“Because sometimes you don’t know that you love someone, until you’ve let them go.” he finally said quietly. 

If possible, Rose swore she could feel her heart stop. It couldn’t be possible that he had just told her he loved her…how could he when he left her for someone else. After years of bottling up her pain and telling herself she had moved on, Rose could feel that bottle shattering in her chest and suddenly it felt as though she had just left him yesterday. Feeling the weight of her gaze still on him, he turned his head back towards her. Looking deep into her eyes, he noticed tears beginning to form and his hearts broke again. He didn’t want to add to her pain. 

“Please don’t cry, Rose Tyler. I had always wished I would never be the cause of your tears.” he said to her. 

“I guess I didn’t get my wish.” he stated sadly. 

“No, you did not.” she replied, looking away from him. 

After a minute of tense silence, the Doctor spoke. “Rose…I’m so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I just wasn’t thinking…” he said, finally addressing the matter between them. 

“No you were thinking Doctor, just not with the right part of your body. It was a harsh reality to face, but I finally got it. I wasn’t the one you wanted to be with. Did you have to break my heart to prove it though?” she said. 

“Rose, she meant nothing to me…not like that anyway. I swear to you...” he began, before Rose cut him off. 

“Did you even think about me at all when you jumped through that mirror? You knew you wouldn’t have a way back and you left me there. Did you even care what happened to us? Was I even a thought in your head?” she asked him, finally turning back to him…tears spilling from her eyes. 

The Doctor couldn’t lie to Rose, but he also was afraid to tell her the truth. 

“No you weren’t…” he said to her, looking away again. His words hit her hard. She had always known it was true, but hearing it from his lips made the reality hurt more than she thought it could. 

“I just wanted to be the hero…save the damsel in distress…I didn’t think about what that meant.” he admitted. 

“Ya know, I asked the Tardis to wait a long time before she let you come after me…I guess she kept her promise. Never actually thought you would…figured you’d be happy with me gone. I hoped that if I ever saw you again that it would show you just how much I’d moved on and forgotten you.” Rose said to him. 

Her words stung him. He hadn’t ever thought that Rose was the reason why the Tardis wouldn’t let him go after her…that it was because Rose hadn’t wanted to see him. “And have you? Forgotten me?” he asked, turning back towards her to see her answer. The Doctor hoped with all of his hearts that her answer would be ‘no’…that she would give him some hope that there was still a chance she would forgive him. 

Rose looked out at the horizon in thought. The truth she knew now was that she hadn’t forgotten him…hadn’t really gotten over him. And here he was…and she didn’t know what to tell herself, let alone him. She took in a deep breath and sighed. She turned towards him and the look on her face told him she had not forgotten him and the hope that he had wished for appeared. 

“Rose…” he started. 

“I have to go…” she said, looking at him. As Rose stood and turned to leave, intent on running far away again, the Doctor’s hand reached up and grabbed hers. 

She stopped and closed her eyes at the contact…she hadn’t realized just how much she had missed it. 

“Rose, please…come with me.” he said to her. 

Standing on the edge of the pier with the Doctor’s hand in hers, Rose truly did not know what she wanted to do. Stay with Jack or go back to the Doctor? When she finally opened her eyes, Rose looked up and there standing not far from her…was Jack…watching their exchange. Looking into the eyes of one man she loved, while holding the hand of the other…her heart tore in two. Doing the only thing in that moment that she knew whole heartedly she wanted to do, Rose tore her hand from the Doctor’s and turned her eyes away from Jack and ran. 

Once again, Rose found herself running as fast as her legs would carry her to anywhere that wasn’t there. She was finding herself more conflicted than ever. Her life these last few years since she left the Doctor had become so simple and although it had taken her a while, she had finally adapted to living a day-to-day life just like everyone else…again. Something had always felt like it was missing though. Rose would often find herself looking up into the night sky and think of the life she used to have…the one that made her feel whole. 

Was it the Doctor that she missed? Or the traveling? The adventure? The Tardis? She didn’t know…maybe it was all of the above. Trying to satisfy her wanderlust, she had tried to add more excitement into her life working with Torchwood and her relationship with Jack. But something was always amiss. These last couple of hours though had turned all of that on its head and Rose was again trying to gain her footing. 

Aside from her newfound immortality, Rose had a matter of the heart to contend with. Jack or the Doctor? She never thought she would have to ask herself that question. Back when she traveled with the Doctor, there was no one that could compare with him. That is, until he broke her heart. Then she had found Jack all over again and he had certainly changed her opinion of him. Since they had become a couple, there was no one that could compare. She had occasionally thought to herself that if she ever saw the Doctor again, he would realize how much better of a man Jack was than he. 

Jack might have slept with every being in the universe, but when it came to her…there was no one else. His loyalty and love had astounded her. No one compared. Now…she was questioning everything. Jack was still an amazing man and she loved him with most of her heart, the rest still belonging to the Doctor. However, her guilt would overwhelm her every time she had to look into his eyes. Then again, if she chose the Doctor she would spend eternity wondering when he would once again cast her aside. 

Rose needed advice and there was no one else that she wanted it from. This wasn’t an issue that could be hashed out over the phone…no, it had to be done in person. After what felt like an eternity of running, Rose found herself at the train station. Without thinking about it, she strode up to the ticket window and flashed her Torchwood ID to the attendant. 

“Rose Tyler with Torchwood. One ticket to London, please.” she asked the man. 

“Will that be one-way or round-trip, Miss Tyler?” he asked her. 

Rose paused for a moment, not realizing she hadn’t thought about the question. 

“One-way.” she said. There was no charge for the ticket of course, since working for Torchwood was just as good as working for the government. 

“Here you are Miss Tyler. Your train will be boarding in 5 minutes.” the attendant said as he handed her the one-way ticket for London. 

Without a thank you, Rose turned and strode towards her train…not wanting to look back. As she sat in her seat at the far back of the train, Rose thought about the question that the attendant had asked her. ‘One-way or round-trip?’ She had only intended on seeing her mum. With so many new questions in her head, she wanted nothing more than to collapse into her mother’s arms and sob. But that question made her think. If Rose had wanted to run away from her problems, then a one-way ticket would be perfect. Maybe Rose didn’t want to go back after all. 

She wouldn’t have to see the Doctor again and she wouldn’t have to see Jack’s face when she broke his heart. Why not ignore things and run away? Isn’t that what the Doctor had always done? Maybe she should take a tip from him for once. She could always go back to unit…start a new life, again. After her train had pulled into the station, Rose made her way to the Powell Estate and knocked on her mum’s door. 

“Coming!” Jackie yelled from inside the flat. When Jackie opened the door, she was shocked to find her daughter on the other side. 

“Rose! Oh my god, sweetheart! You didn’t tell me you were coming!” she exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around her daughter. 

Feeling her mum’s warm arms around her, Rose broke. As she began sobbing into her mum’s shoulder, Jackie’s arms tightened in concern. What had happened to her daughter to make her come all this way in such a state? 

“Shh, it’s ok sweetheart. Whatever it is, we’ll work it out.” Jackie said to her as she stroked the back of Rose’s head in a calming gesture. After a minute, Jackie pulled the sobbing Rose into the apartment and closed the door. 

BWBWBWBWBWBWBWBW

As the Doctor felt Rose’s hand slip from his and watched her run away from him, panic overtook him. He jumped up from his seat and intended on taking off after her again, but had been stopped by another hand. 

“Just let her go, Doc. She needs time to think.” Jack said. 

Intent on pushing his arm away and ignore Jack’s words, his mind was changed when Jack’s grip on the Doctor’s coat had tightened. 

“Why aren’t you going after her?” the Doctor asked him. 

“Because I’m the one she’s running from.” he said with a heartbroken expression. 

“And so are you.” Jack said to him. 

“I need to fix this.” said the Doctor. 

“It’s not for us to fix. When are you going to get it Doctor? This is Rose’s life…not yours.” he said. 

“She is my life.” he said, finally turning to glare at the other man. 

“She’s my life too, Doc.” Jack returned. Staring at the face of Jack Harkness, the Doctor found himself finally letting the extent of his actions sink in. 

“Sit down, Doc. Let’s talk.” Jack said as he led them to a nearby bench.


	4. Listen To Your Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Multiple hearts are breaking.

After a long heart-felt talk with her mum, Rose had felt much better than she thought she would. However, she was still no closer to figuring out what she needed to do and had to take a walk to let her mum’s advice sink in. As Rose walked around the Powell Estate, she let her conversation with her mum replay in her mind. 

“Ok, so you’re basically going to live forever, yeah?” her mum asked and Rose nodded sadly. 

“Ok, well at least I won’t have to lose you then!” said Jackie. 

“Really?” Rose asked, stunned by her mum’s reaction. 

“Of course, sweetheart. You’re still my daughter…even if you are bloody immortal now.” replied Jackie as she threw her arms around her daughter and pulled in to her for a large, comforting hug. 

One thing Rose always loved about her mum was that she always knew how to counteract Rose’s bad moods and this was definitely one of those moments when Jackie knew freaking out would not help her daughter. As crazy as Jackie Tyler could be sometimes, Rose could always count on her mum to be the voice of reason when she couldn’t hear it. 

“Now, what are you going to do about Jack and the Doctor?” she asked. 

“I don’t know, mum! I thought I’d gotten over the Doctor, but now…I think I love ‘em both. And I don’t want to hurt either of them.” Rose said. 

“But one of them is going to get hurt Rose. I’m sorry, sweetheart, but what is your heart telling you to do?” Jackie asked. 

“I don’t know.” Rose said, still sobbing on Jackie’s shoulder. 

“Rose, sweetheart…look at me.” Jackie said as Rose lifted her head and turned to look at her mother. 

“It’s obvious that you never got over the Doctor. If you had, then you wouldn’t be feeling like this. I know you love Jack, but I think you know what your heart is telling you to do…you just don’t want to listen yet.” said Jackie. 

“I’m not ready to go back to him mum. I don’t know if I can trust him again after what happened.” said Rose. 

“But you guys will work on that, together. Rose, as much as I want to slap that daft alien sometimes, I know he loves you. I think the two of you belong together.” Jackie told her. 

Still letting the conversation replay in her head over and over, Rose let her mind wander as she walked and soon found herself in a nearby park. Sitting down on a bench, she watched couples walking by her hand-in-hand and it made her sad. Why couldn’t her life be just that easy? Almost as if fate was whispering in her ear telling her what to do, she heard a stereo blasting music from a nearby waiting car. 

When Rose turned her head around, she saw a woman sitting in her car waiting for someone as the car ran. The lyrics from the song suddenly hit her like a ton of bricks and she froze as she swore her heart stopped. The song playing on the woman’s radio was “Listen To Your Heart” by Roxette. Rose sat there letting the song sink in, wallowing in her misery. 

“Listen to your heart, when he’s calling for you. Listen to your heart, there’s nothing else you can do. I don’t know where you’re going and I don’t know why, but listen to your heart before you tell him goodbye.” 

Well, she already knew what her heart was telling her to do…she just didn’t want to do it. As she sat and listened to the song, she was reminded of lyrics from another Roxette song that began swimming in her head. 

“It must have been love, but it’s over now. From the moment we touched, to the time here right now.” 

Tears began to fall from her eyes as she realized that this was the end and she was going to have to break the heart of one of the men that she loved. It was the end of her and Jack. Up until recently, she had thought they would spend eternity together, but her situation now changed everything and she decided that she could no longer face him after what she had done to him…as a friend yes, but not as a person he should love. She would go back to the Doctor, but not right away. As much as she knew that her current powers were the fault of no one but her, she did still blame the Doctor for the situation she was in. 

How could he not tell her about Jack? She was still arguing with her heart. She still loved the Doctor, but she didn’t trust him. And how could she go back to him when she was still scared that he would abandon her once more? Rose still needed some time to herself to figure out what this new, long life of hers would mean and if that would fundamentally change who she is. How long that would take though, she didn’t know. Rose had questions though and despite her internal debate, she knew there was really one person to ask. She took her phone out of her jacket pocket and dialed the Tardis. 

“Hello?! Rose?!” asked the Doctor, alarmed and out of breath as he answered the phone. After a beat, Rose took a breath and spoke. 

“Yeah, it’s me Doctor.” she said calmly. 

“Are you ok? Where are you?” he asked her. 

“I’m fine. I’m at mum’s. Is Jack with you?” she asked. 

“No, he went back to his office.” said the Doctor. 

“Rose I’m so sorry if I upset you again. Please let me come get you.” he said to her. 

“No Doctor, please don’t. Thing is, I just have a question.” Rose said. 

“Anything Rose…” he replied right away. She took a breath and asked. 

“Doctor, after we thought I lost this power…you told me what I did to the Daleks. Told me how I turned them to dust. Why didn’t you tell me what I did to Jack?” Rose asked him more calmly then she thought she would. 

“Because he was our friend. I didn’t want you to have to carry the burden. When it’s a friend’s life you’ve affected, it just hurts you that much more. Believe me, Rose. I know. I didn’t want that kind of pain for you…knowing what happened.” replied the Doctor. 

“But Doctor, if you had told me…then maybe I wouldn’t have fallen in love with him…I wouldn’t be in this situation now. You could have prevented this…” she said. 

“I never thought this could happen Rose. But you are right. I could have prevented all of this. If I had told you…maybe I wouldn’t have lost you. You’d still be with me.” he said. 

Rose took in a deep breath and sighed. She already knew what she was going to do, but she didn’t want to do it. She wasn’t ready for it yet. She knew what she would rather do, but that wasn’t the responsible thing. She was torn. 

“I’ve got to go Doctor.” Rose said as she was getting ready to hang up the phone. 

“No, wait, please Rose.” begged the Doctor. 

“Please come back…come back and we can work on this together. I want you to come with me. Please.” he begged. 

“I can’t Doctor. Not right now. Thing is, I think I need to figure this out on my own. I don’t know what that means and I don’t know how, but I need to do this alone. I’ve got to go. Goodbye.” she said as she hung up the phone before the Doctor could get another word in. 

Rose knew that had she let him, he would have continued to talk and she wouldn’t have been able to say no to his argument. She would have given in, but what she really needed was to work this out on her own. Before closing her phone, she sent one more message…to Jack. She just couldn’t face him, couldn’t talk to him…she didn’t want to hear the hurt she was going to cause him. Feeling more like the Doctor in that moment than ever before, she chose the easy way out. The text was simple and she knew he would understand its meaning. 

“I’m sorry.” 

As Rose put the phone back in her jacket pocket, a tear ran down her cheek as she thought about how drastic of a turn this day had taken. She woke up feeling fantastic and in love, but now, she literally had no idea who she was anymore. She wasn’t just a normal human girl, she wasn’t an alien…was she still Rose Tyler? She didn’t belong with Jack and she didn’t belong with the Doctor. Sure, her mum would support her, but she couldn’t possibly understand what Rose was going through. 

In that moment, she had no greater desire than the wish to simply disappear and go as far away as possible…away from everyone she knew who knew her as Rose Tyler, away from the simple human life she was living, and away from all of the pain that she was feeling. She didn’t want to face the future…and so she didn’t. In a breath, Rose was gone and all that was left behind, was a mist of golden stardust. 

BWBWBWWBWBWBWBWBW

Jack sat at his desk, staring at the pile of papers stacked before him. He couldn’t think of anything else but Rose and he wondered desperately where she was. He knew she would want to be alone, but it had been almost 8 hours since she had left and she had not contacted him…he was worried. She had so much pain in her eyes when she left and he began to doubt whether she would be able to love him anymore after this. 

Jack reached over to open his right-hand desk drawer and took out a small black box from inside. As he opened the box, he stared at the small diamond ring sitting in the center and sighed. As he replayed the events of the day in his mind, he felt as if his heart was sinking out of his chest to his stomach. Jack doubted the possibility of ever placing it on Rose’s finger now and after the long talk he had with the Doctor shortly after Rose had ran, he had never doubted this more. 

He had wanted so badly to give the Doctor a piece of his mind…tell him Rose was his, that he screwed up and to get lost. But as he saw how heartbroken the Doctor was as Rose ran from both of them, he no longer felt the need to. Seeing the hurt in his eyes was proof enough that there was nothing Jack could say that the Doctor wasn’t already thinking himself. 

“Ya know, Doc…if there’s one thing I’ve learned in the years I’ve been with Rose, it’s that she is the strongest woman I’ve ever met. But…she also has a hard time letting people get close to her. Sound like anyone you know?” Jack asked the Doctor, but only got a stone-face in return. So he continued. 

“I remember when I first met you and Rose, she was so open and trusting and full of adventure, but she’s changed since then. When I saw Rose again, she was harder…less trusting. I blame you for that, Doc. Underneath it all, she’s still the same wonderful Rose she’s always been and if you’re lucky, she’ll let you see it. Knowing that Rose loves you is the best feeling in the universe, but if she doesn’t trust you…well, there’s no greater pain.” Jack paused again to look at the Doctor, but again it didn’t seem like his words were registering. 

“She told me what happened…and I don’t blame her for leaving you. To be honest Doc, I never thought you could ever do something like that to her. When I first saw the two of you together, I didn’t think anything would come between you guys. You were the only ones who didn’t realize it at the time…just how much you loved each other. But everyone else did. I’m not going to rub in how much you screwed up because I can tell you already know. You’ve changed Doctor…and it doesn’t seem like for the better.” 

Jack was about ready to give up on his one-sided conversation with the heartbroken Time-Lord, when he finally got a response. 

“I messed up Jack.” said the Doctor, quietly. 

“Yes, you did.” Jack replied. 

“I don’t even have a good reason…I just wasn’t thinking. And then as soon as it was over and I realized what had happened, Rose was gone.” he said. 

The Doctor leaned forward, sitting his elbows on his knees and ran his hands over his face in frustration. 

“I don’t know what to do Jack. I honestly didn’t realized how I even felt until I realized she was gone. Then I finally get here and she’s moved on. I lost her Jack. I lost Rose.” 

Sitting on the bench together, neither Jack nor the Doctor knew what to say to each other to make the situation better. They were both in love with the same woman and both afraid she would leave for the other. The Doctor hated admitting all of this to the man that had ultimately stolen Rose from him, but he knew there was no one else who would understand just how special she is…just how much he had lost. 

Jack also didn’t want to admit to the Doctor that he was worried Rose would leave him and go back to the Doctor. He had always wondered if Rose was truly over him and what would happen if he ever came back to get her. Jack had planned on putting up a fight for her…showing the Doctor what he had lost, but now when he was facing the same situation…he just wanted Rose to be happy. Deciding to be the bigger man that Rose had always said he was, Jack tried to put a comforting hand on the Doctor’s shoulder. 

“Doctor, Rose will come back when she’s ready to…I know her. She needs to figure this out for herself and when she comes back, she’ll let us know what she wants. Okay?” he asked and the Doctor nodded. 

Jack stood up to leave but turned to look at the Doctor one more time. 

“I love her too, Doc, so I know how you must be feeling…you know where to find me if you need to talk.” he said before leaving. 

He had always known just how much Rose loved him, but Jack had always wondered if she still held on to feelings for the Doctor. He never liked to admit it to himself, but Jack had always felt as though Rose and the Doctor were meant to be together. At times, he would catch himself thinking back to his times on the Tardis and wonder how it was possible that they were ever apart. However, thinking this felt as if he were betraying his love for Rose. Jack never felt like he was second best…he knew he was a good man and he deserved Rose. 

But when he saw the look in her eyes when she saw the Doctor again today, he knew his hunch was right…she had not gotten over him. Staring now at the engagement ring he had hoped to give her, Jack knew what he would have to do…if he loved her, he would let her go. If Rose came back and decided she wanted to be with the Doctor, then he step aside…because he loved her and only wanted her to be happy. Of course, he hoped that wouldn’t happen, but as the phone on his desk began to vibrate and he saw there was a message from Rose, a lump formed in his throat. 

“I’m sorry.” was all it said and he knew what it meant. Rose wasn’t coming back to him.


	5. One Step Closer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose makes a couple of decisions.

Rose didn’t want to exist…it was that plain and simple. She didn’t want to be anything. Her life had been completely broken…her very soul had been ripped apart and haphazardly put back together…and she couldn’t deal with it. What did her new-found immortality mean? What would she do…where would she go? She had no idea. She had just hurt both of the men she loved and she wasn’t ready to go back. 

Determined to be nothing…to do nothing…Rose stayed as stardust and all she did was think. She felt like a goddess. She was a goddess…of space and time. Years had passed. How many? She didn’t know, but it felt like a thousand. During all of that time, Rose floated as dust across all of time and space observing the universe and helping civilizations from her ethereal perch. 

She was everywhere and nowhere at the same time…in all times. She had influenced kings and poets and artists, had helped those who needed it. And she did it all by stardust. Stories had swarmed throughout the galaxies of the goddess of time, torn from her corporeal body by heartbreak and the remorseful lover that was waiting for her. 

Through it all and throughout the years, Rose thought about the Doctor and wondered if she would ever be ready to go back. She finally wanted to, but could she? She felt a thousand years old and she still didn’t know who she was or what she was doing. Maybe she would never know, but she had been drifting in the stars for so long that she began to forget what it even meant to be corporeal. 

She had been an ethereal being for so long that she was no longer a person, but a deity. Long ago she had closed off her mind to the Doctor to allow herself time to heal. In her current state, she could tap into any mind anywhere in the universe, but his was one she chose to lock out. Now that her heart was healing, Rose opened her mind to him again and was struck when she felt his thoughts of her coming through. 

Although she was a thousand years older, only a few days had passed for the Doctor and his heart was still aching for her. Her heart broke for him again. She could feel his need for her and his sorrow for his actions. Rose was able to tap into his mind and understand his thoughts in a way she never had before and she realized just how truly remorseful he was for what he had done to her. That’s when she decided to go to him. 

Rose found the Doctor standing on the same pier that she had left him on…his eyes closed in deep sorrow and thought. Still not ready for him to see her fully yet, Rose surrounded the Doctor in a golden mist that gently swept over his body. At her gentle touch, the Doctor’s eyes burst open and her name came from his mind to hers. He knew she was here and she felt his hearts soar. As soon as he realized it was her, he begged her once again to come back to him. 

“Rose, please. Come back to me.” she heard from his thoughts and she finally knew something. 

She was ready to go back to him. Rose knew that the Doctor understood he had hurt her enough for her to leave him, but did he really understand just how much of her faith in him had been broken? She needed him to realize just what she had given up when she left him. Rose used to be captivated by him…he was everything to her…and when he made the decision to jump through a mirror and leave her, he left the entire possibility of a future together behind. He had left her behind. 

She had always been there for him, holding his hand through everything and he chose to leave her and now that she was ready to face him and return, she wanted to make sure he understood her heartache. No matter where she went, what she was, or how long she was away, his face and his voice was always playing like a record in her mind, reminding her of her broken heart and driving away all desire to be human again. 

But most of all, Rose wanted him to know that through all of these thoughts and emotions, through all of the loneliness and heartache, she still loved him. Communicating with him the only way she knew how, she let the words of the song “My Immortal” play through his mind and saw the tears he was crying when he finally let her heartbreak sink in. 

“I’m so sorry, Rose. I ruined your trust in me and I know you must hate me, but please believe that I never meant to hurt you. I love you, Rose. Please come back. Please forgive me…give me some kind of sign, some hope, that one day you will come back to me. Please?” she heard and it was then that she finally felt it again…she finally felt human once more. 

Her heart ached for his and in that moment, she wanted to give him hope, so as she finally let her presence around him go, she left him with another song that told him exactly how she felt. She had loved him for a thousand years and she will love him for a thousand more. Rose was one step closer to being back by the Doctor’s side, but there were a few things she needed to do first. 

After a few days of waiting in his Tardis, hoping Rose would return, the Doctor began feeling anxious that maybe it was never going to happen…she wasn’t coming back to him. She didn’t love him anymore. Needing to clear his head, the Doctor left his ship and began walking…knowing exactly where he wanted to go. As the Doctor stood at the pier looking out at the water and thinking of the last time he was in this place…with Rose…watching her run from him…her fingers slipping from his…his hearts ached again. 

What was he going to do? Wait. That’s what he was going to do. He was going to leave his Tardis right where it was and wait for her to come back to him…however long it took her, he would wait. However long she needed, he would be there waiting for her when she was ready. He closed his eyes, trying to stop the tears that were threatening to fall out of frustration. Not at Rose, never at Rose. At himself. 

This was all his fault. He had lost her because of the stupid things he had done and now he was praying to whatever gods were listening that she would find him again. At that moment, his skin because to tingle as if an electric current was pulsing through him. The Doctor opened his eyes to find himself surrounding by golden dust. Rose. He knew it was her…there was no way to explain it…he just knew. He had seen that kind of gold before…in her eyes when she was the Bad Wolf. 

“Rose, please. Come back to me.” he thought, knowing she would fully hear whatever was going through his mind. Suddenly, the chorus of a song began to play as if from nowhere. Was it only in his head? 

“You used to captivate me by your resonating light. Now I'm bound by the life you left behind. Your face—it haunts my once pleasant dreams. Your voice—it chased away all the sanity in me. These wounds won't seem to heal. This pain is just too real. There's just too much that time cannot erase. When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears. When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears and I held your hand through all of these years, but you still have all of me. I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone, but though you're still with me, I've been alone all along.” 

As the song in his head ended, the tears that he was trying to hold back began to flow freely. He had hurt her more than he had thought and wherever she was, she was still hurting because of it. She had always been there for him, held his hand when he needed it and comforted him when he was upset. She had held his hand through everything and he threw it all away. 

“I’m so sorry, Rose. I ruined your trust in me and I know you must hate me, but please believe that I never meant to hurt you. I love you, Rose. Please come back. Please forgive me…give me some kind of sign, some hope, that one day you will come back to me. Please?” the Doctor begged to her through his thoughts, but it seemed as though Rose was not ready to speak to him just yet. As he watched the golden mist around him swirl and evaporate, one more song came through his head. 

“I have died everyday waiting for you. Darling don't be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years. I'll love you for a thousand more and all along I believed I would find you. Time has brought your heart to me. I have loved you for a thousand years. I'll love you for a thousand more. One step closer.” 

As the music in his head died and the golden mist around him disintegrated, more tears fell from his eyes…but this time, they weren’t of sadness. They were tears of happiness. He finally had hope…Rose had given him hope. Hope that she would come back. He knew now that she still loved him and no matter where she was or what had happened to her, she still loved him. No matter how much he had hurt her, she still loved him and she was coming back. When? He didn’t know, but one day. There was one thing he knew though…they were one step closer.


	6. Let's Go Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter! Rose follows her heart.

Before leaving her ethereal perch, Rose thought back to the reasons she had come to this place to begin with. She had been heartbroken. However, in her heartbreak, she broke the heart of not only someone she had loved deeply, but someone who had been a loving and loyal friend as well. Jack’s heart had been broken when she left him and now she had to make it up to him. 

During the thousand years that Rose had been playing the part of a deity, she had seen the many possibilities of how her relationship with him would have played out…and many of the outcomes didn’t end happily. Eventually Jack’s eyes would begin to wander again or she would begin to resent the fact that he wasn’t the Doctor. Sure, in every outcome, they stuck together because they were too lonely on their own, but they were miserable. 

The best outcome was one that resulted in both of them realizing that they just weren’t meant to be lovers anymore, deciding instead they were simply best friends who would stay together forever. She began to look at his timelines without her and she found his happy ending. Yes, this person turned out to be perfect for Jack…could match him in every aspect of his life and personality. Now she just had to play the divine matchmaker. 

Despite trying to be the bigger man, Jack was still heartbroken when he realized he had lost Rose. In the years that him and Rose had been together, he thought his life had taken a change for the better. He was in love and had finally found someone that he could spend his entire existence with. He had never thought he would find such happiness and now he knew it was just too good to be true. 

After a few days of locking himself in his Torchwood office, he found himself wanting to make peace with his situation and went back to the last location he had seen Rose…and found the Doctor standing looking out at the water instead. With a deep breath and a sigh, Jack walked up and put his hand on the Doctor’s shoulder. 

“How long you been standing here Doc? You look like hell.” said Jack. 

“She came to me Jack. Rose, she came to me.” the Doctor responded softly, looking down at the edge of the pier he was standing on. 

“What do you mean Doc? Rose was here?!” Jack asked, but the Doctor shook his head. 

“Not completely. Not in physical form anyway. Apparently, she’s figured her new powers out. I don’t think she wanted me to see her yet.” he said quietly. 

“Well, at least she came back in some form. That’s a good sign Doc. Don’t give up hope.” Jack offered him. Finally the Doctor turned to look at Jack. 

“I haven’t even thought how you have been doing. I’m so sorry Jack. You lost Rose as well and I didn’t even consider…” he started. 

“It’s ok, Doc.” Jack said, cutting him off. 

“I’ve been thinking these last couple of days and I decided that Rose and me…we just weren’t meant to be. But you two…” Jack finished with a head shake. The Doctor looked back out to the water again. 

“My actions have hurt so many people, yet again. Maybe Rose is right not to come back to me.” the Doctor stated. 

“Come on Doc. You know that’s not true. Ya know, it’s bit funny that I’m the one out here trying to cheer you up when that’s what I was looking for. Weirder things have happened I guess.” Jack said off-handedly. 

“I don’t deserve it.” says the Doctor. 

“We all deserve to be happy Doctor. Even you.” Jack says, then pauses. 

“I’m here to give you guys my blessing Doctor. And just so you know, you have Mickey’s as well.” Jack said as the Doctor’s head whipped back around. 

“What?!” exclaimed the Doctor. 

“You coming back was always my biggest fear. I knew that if this day ever came, that Rose would leave me. Well, I didn’t know, but I feared it. It’s always been you two, since day one. Since the first time I met you both. Even with the ears and the attitude, I knew she loved you. And you have my blessing. Just…be good to her Doc. Don’t hurt her again.” finished Jack. 

The Doctor was awestruck. After a moment, he responded. 

“Jack I…I promise I will try to never hurt Rose again.” 

“Good, cause if I find out that you did anything to cause her pain again, I will find you. And just remember this Doc. Just because you can regenerate, doesn’t mean you’re immortal. You can still die…I can’t.” Jack said with a smirk. 

“Was that a threat Jack Harkness?” asked the Doctor. 

“You bet your ass it is.” he responded. 

“You’re a good man, Jack.” said the Doctor. 

“Ya, how did that happen?” Jack joked. 

“Rose.” the Doctor stated and Jack nodded his head. 

“Yup…Rose.” he said. 

“Well Doc, why don’t you come back in…or at least go back to the Tardis. Mickey’s decided to stay at Torchwood, so you’d have the place to yourself. You really do look like hell.” Jack said. 

“Not yet.” said the Doctor. 

“Ok, well you know where I am.” said Jack as he turned and left. 

When Jack walked back into his Torchwood office, he froze in the doorway at the sight of the golden mist around his desk. 

“What the…” he said. Then it struck him. 

“Rose? Is that you?” he whispered. 

The golden mist enveloped him and he could feel her warm essence surround him. He felt her love for him, her concern and her sorrow. It was Rose. 

“Oh Rose, I love you…but it’s ok. I’m ok. I just want you to be happy. Please come back…the Doctor needs you.” 

The mist left him, went back to his desk, and evaporated. Where the mist once was, Jack saw a glittering gold note. Jack walked around and sat in the chair in front of his desk as he picked up the note Rose had left him. On it was a set of coordinates and the word “Spoilers”, signed with love from Rose. Jack smiled. He didn’t know what it meant yet, but Rose was leaving him something and that meant everything. He entered the coordinates into his Vortex Manipulator and vanished. As Rose left, she knew she was doing the right thing. Sending him to the right person. River Song was Jack’s perfect match and she would give him everything she couldn’t. 

With Jack’s fate taken care of, Rose knew it was now time to return to the Doctor. With a deep breath, she readied herself. Floating down out of her ether, she found the Doctor still standing on the same pier. She let her golden mist surround him briefly as she floated behind him. 

“Rose!” whispered the Doctor. 

The Doctor’s hearts were soaring again and tears were threatening to fall from his eyes. In the brief seconds that Rose’s mist surrounded him, his hope began to bubble over at all of the love and joy he felt radiating from her. This was it, he knew it. He could feel it. Rose was coming back to him. The Doctor was a happy mixture of pure shock and immense joy. His head darted around as the mist left his body and floated behind him. She was not moving. 

“Rose, please. I love you, please!” he begged. 

Then, before his eyes, the golden mist he knew was Rose began to take the form of Rose. Tears of joy were flowing freely from his eyes as the corporeal face of Rose Tyler smiled back at him. 

“Hello.” she said. 

“Rose.” the Doctor said, stunned. 

He looked down into the face he had desperately been longing to see…only a foot away from his own. She was more beautiful than ever. Her hair was longer, past her shoulders, and glittered gold as if the sun itself radiated from it. Her eyes let him know that she was much older now than she looked, but the gold glow in them died down to a speck of glitter. 

“Doctor” she sighed. The Doctor slowly reached his hand up to cup her cheek and let out a breath when he was actually able to touch her. Her eyes closed at his touch. 

“Oh Rose, I’m so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I am so sorry.” he begged her. 

“I know, Doctor.” she said as she opened her eyes to look at him. 

“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have left you like that…either time.” she responded. He smiled lovingly at her and she returned it. 

“Rose, you have nothing to be sorry about. You were right to leave me. I was horrible to you. But never again. Just please tell me…tell me you’re here to stay.” he begged her again. 

“I’m here to stay Doctor…not going anywhere. Forever remember, yeah?” 

“Yeah.” he agreed with a wide smile. 

The Doctor moved his arms to wrap around Rose and engulfed her in a hug, burying his face in her neck and breathing in her scent. She no longer smelled like just Rose, she smelled like the universe…like a goddess. Pulling his head back, the Doctor once again cupped her cheek with his hand as he leaned in and pressed his lips to hers for a kiss that let her know just how much he loved and missed her. As they broke the kiss and pulled away, they rested their foreheads against each other…tears now streaming down both of their faces. 

“Oh, I love you Rose Tyler…very much.” 

“I love you too, Doctor.” The Doctor smiled wide at her again. 

“Come on Doctor, let’s go home.” Rose said as she reached down and took his hand in hers. 

“Yes, let’s go home.” he responded with a smile. Turning, Rose and the Doctor walked hand-in-hand back to the Tardis to begin the forever they were always meant to have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you to all of the wonderful comments I have received! I'm so glad you liked it!


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